It was as if God grabbed the back of my neck and pushed me to feel every possible emotion that I encountered at peak level, then forced me to look at myself in the mirror and reflect on each emotion. It was so intense and revealing that I almost had a breakdown. Almost. Instead, love held me up. Self-love and the love of family and friends held me up… and I don’t take any of it for granted. Although I ordered “The Seat of the Soul” by Gary Zukav in March of this year, I finally picked it and started reading it as a birthday gift to myself. Thanks to the forewords written by Oprah Winfrey and the Late Maya Angelou, I now know how important this body of work is that I am about to read; how important it to allow my personality to serve my soul, unapologetically. What is refreshing thus far is that this book completely validates some of the huge changes that I have made in my life. It also is showing me how much I don’t know about my potential and myself.

Each day I learned the following:

Day 1: True loves exists and when it is witnessed, it evokes an array of emotions. Did you miss the #foreverduncan story? People love a good love story. People also hate a good love story. It was fascinating to watch it happen and all of the aftermath on the Internet. Do what you love with the right intentions. It may lead to viral exposure. It may not.

Day 2: The Internet is an external power with the ability to alter your life and the lives of people around you, if you allow it. However going viral doesn’t mean going wealthy. Create a plan to build and acquire wealth. The Internet should be a resource in your plan, not the plan.

Day 3: I want to be wealthy and live and work in spaces where my personality serves my soul and I fulfill my purpose(s). This is my definition of happiness and I am in the pursuit of it. It will take time, but I will accomplish it. Learn what your personal philosophy is. Then live by it.

Day 4: My fear of fame is rooted in the fear to fail and be shamed for failing. I know that I will fail at something relative to what I do and who I am, and I know that someone will shame me for it. I will get through my fear of fame though. Identify your fears. Then work at overcoming them.

Day 5: The people who consistently love me despite my failures are the people who get to provide me with feedback and commentary when a failure occurs. They know who they are. Everyone else… the strongest “Nope” is what you will receive from me when you try me. Be mindful of who deserves to live in your inner circle. They should not be ‘yes men’. ‘Yes men’ will lead you to failure.

Day 6: If you need help, do not be afraid to ask for help. Feeling ashamed to ask for help is stupid. If your intention when asking for help is good and genuine, you will be sent the right person(s) that can help you to become successful.

Day 7: As I continue to build this company with my siblings, we move forward knowing that we must work with people who believe in the brand and our evolving vision for it. Involving people who solely believe in your ability to put money in their pockets is detrimental.   As tempting as it can be, say “Nope” to collaborators and investors that are sharks, regardless of what they offer.

Day 8: You need love to feed your soul, so that when hate appears, your love armor will stop the hate from taking over. Allow love to manifest in your life. Understand that real love is about giving love abundantly, not just receiving it.

Day 9: Never stop appreciating your friends and family. Ever. Make time for them and give them your undivided attention while you communicate with them. Also, your friends can be your family and your family can be your friends.

Day 10: As a leader in business, you must have a team of subject matter experts that are fulfilling their purpose when they are doing work for you. {Refer to Day 3} Otherwise things will fall apart and you will be left to clean up their mess.

Day 11: Value the goods and services you offer the way that you value yourself. Don’t compromise yourself. Don’t compromise your offerings.

Day 12: Practice good habits that will strengthen your spirit, personality and body… in that order. Begin with listening to positive affirmations when you start your day. Do not underestimate how powerful words can be, especially when you don’t hear them.

Day 13: If you need more time to meet someone’s expectation, communicate that as quickly as you can. You create more disappointment than you probably anticipated if you wait to communicate, or do not communicate at all.

Day 14: Make yourself physically available when it is necessary. When it is not, spend time with yourself. You deserve “you” time, and you don’t have to justify it to anyone.

Day 15: #Blackgirlmagic is more than a hashtag; it is a powerful way of thinking that can curate movements, events, and overall success of people… when it is used for good. I have the pleasure of being apart of collectives like The SABA Collective, MindHERBusiness, and Barter Babes curated by beautiful, wonderful women that I am in partnership with. I overflow with #blackgirlmagic and commit to only use it for good. Respect #blackgirlmagic.

Day 16: As an entrepreneur, your spirit is constantly being tested by distractions that could lead to failure. Be mindful that multiple opportunities to earn income may not be a distraction if the opportunities align with your purpose. {Revisit my Day 3 folks…}

Day 17: If you can communicate with someone with a method that allows you to see them while you speak with them, do so. Google Hangout and FaceTime are an enhancement to my life. It makes it a little easier on me, because I miss being in the physical presence of so many people in my life. I love a lot of folks.

Day 18: Along the same vein of Day 17, do not depend solely on Facebook to let you know when someone who you care about has a birthday coming up. Sit down at some point of the year and add important birthdays to your personal calendar. Then contact them on their birthday. You never know… it could be the last time that you both communicate.

Day 19: Visit a hospital and watch someone lay still, connected to life support machines with little hope of recovery. As you stare in awe at the concert of machines and tubes working to keep this person alive, you will wonder if they applied Day 3 to their life. Also, if you love that person that is on life support, you will probably cry the most tears you have ever cried in your life and think about your own mortality. Next level: take all of this anguish and call a parent to express your sadness only to find out that they are also in the hospital. When I say you will fall into a kick-in-the-gut crying spell! Unless you are a robot. It is okay to ugly cry and be afraid. You are entitled to be in the moment and express your emotions, even the sad ones. Besides, you already know not to take people in your life for granted… especially your parents…right?

Day 20: The spirit is immortal. Allow your spirit to dictate how you live. It will keep you close to God and far from foolery. Don’t forget that you will die though, so consider living a life that involves Day 3. Feeling like a broken record right about now… but oh well. It is what it is.

Day 21: Adulting is HARD AF. There is quite a bit to navigate through and figure out. Sometimes you’re going to fail. Other times, you are going to achieve. Sometimes people who you love stop loving you. Sometimes you will stop loving someone. Life can suck. When you fail, be real with yourself about the failure, but get back up. That way, when you achieve, you celebrate without hesitation, because you know that you worked for it and it is well deserved.

My October smacked me in the face with 21 lessons in the most amazing way. All of the emotions you can think of were felt, but on the 21st day, I felt nothing but love. I traveled; I was treated extremely well by strangers as well as by my loved ones. I even was loved on by some new loves. Yep, it is what it is! I meditated. I put on make-up and dressed in a fancy vintage dress. I drank, and danced. I was filmed and pictured. I read some of the best text messages. I was hugged and kissed, and was hugged and kissed again. I woke up to love notes from sisters in my life and I finally cried a joyous cry again. I watched videos sent to me and read every message left on my Facebook wall. I was showered with love in various ways and I am so thankful. As I sit, overflowing with love, my intention is to pass this love on to whoever is ready to receive it. Cheers to the pursuit of happiness and the infusion of love while doing it.

Live. Love. Laugh.  ~Miss GK~

Featured Image: Courtesy of Dior Davis Photography

Published by I Am Gayima.

Author, Flourish or Die (AMAZON.COM) Instagram: @flourishbook Co-Founder of Amyang Fashun™ , A Lifestyle Brand Instagram: @amyang_fashun Executive Director of I Am Gayima. A Marketing Hub. Instagram: @marketinghub_iamgayima Co-Founder of Passport2Zuri, An African Travel Brand Instagram: @passport2zuri

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